Afro chart

Back in the early 1970's, the "afro" hairstyle was all the rage for trendy African-American males, proudly displaying was they thought was their own cultural heritage.

Choose your own stlye with this lovely wall chart.

"Afro chart", 1972
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Did you take a shower?

The claim that a deodorant "builds protection day after day" is pure fanciful advertising exaggeration. It only implies that the wearer of the deodorant does not shower very frequently.

Or if the wearer does sometimes shower, then certain parts of the body go without soap.

"Speed stick", 1968
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Wigs of the times

If you were not blessed with massive amounts of hair, the only solution for an afro hairstyle was by wearing a wig, like those for sale in this ad.

The one in the middle of the page with two projecting domes is particularly funny. People would stop you and call you "Mickey".

"A wig you can dig", 1972
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Summer romance

A full-page ad from the mid 1930s in cartoon format - the manufacturers are keen to remind the reader that girls don't date guys with body odour.

Nothing shady or un-politically-correct with this ad; just very nice art-deco charm.

"Summer romance", 1935
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Are you sure this is safe (4)

Any tan lamp that claims to be 4 times as powerful as the summer sun is not good for you.

This model works with a carbon-arc, which discharges a very high level of ultraviolet light -a malignant melanoma (skin cancer) would be one of the after-effects of indulging in this healthy machine.

The photo of the guy "sunbathing" with dark goggles says it all.

Dangerous stuff.

"Health tan", 1938
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No more bald heads

More remedies for men worried about their thinning mane - and again this one uses a vacuum cap. Can't really tell from the ad if this is a nice latex-like swimming cap or a more rigid and uncomfortable contraption. Like a helmet.

But rejoice: the ad boldly states that this "is the only reasonable HAIR GROWER known to science". Wtf?

Total and absolute quackery in its purest form.

"No more bald heads", 1924
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A hair dryer with legs

Another fantastic piece of 1950's retrofuture gadgetry: the "mobile hair dryer".

It lets you walk, hear, talk and work. Amazing. You can even hear baby cry, whilst using it to dry your hair.

In ivory or pink, this is the first truly whisper quiet hair dryer. Or so the copy says.

"Hear, walk, talk", 1959
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All you want

Ironically, the following piece is an advertisement for toothpaste, not tobacco products.

It invites the reader to smoke all they want, with the understanding that any stains in your teeth will be wiped off by using the product. And you will also get a fresh and minty breath.

"All you want", 1949
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Tooth decay and the importance of brushing after meals only get a passing mention at the bottom of the copy, with the wording "It's mainly up to you". Nice.

No joke to be bald

Losing your hair is not funny - particularly when the before treatment and after treatment pictures do not belong to the same individual. 

These two blokes could be close family, but they are definitely not the same person.

"No joke to be bald", 1930
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The next piece is a fascinating reminder that technology and vanity were cuddly to each other seventy years ago. Just like today.

Instead of the laser powered light of the 21st Century, back then you had alternating pressure and vaccum treatment. WTF?

You could even get a treatment at the barber's for your balding head. Ironic.

"X-ER-VAC", 1937
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No effort at all

"Waistline reducer", 1924
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Some ads are way ahead of their time.

Take this Automatic Waistline Reducer for instance. It could be the main star of a late-night TV advertorial hosted by a lesser-known, evil-twin of a reality-show débutante.

The same empty promises and dubious facts that grace your LCD-screen TV were already there in 1924: Rid yourself of the paunch. Check. Flabby flesh will vanish. Check. Absolutely automatic. Check.

There's no mention at all about keeping a good diet and doing exercise. The Waistline Reducer works almost by magic.

Think about it the next time you do some late-night TV shopping. It's all magic.

Handsome fighting men

This post is a rarity - a page of a WWII-vintage magazine with *two* mad ads in it; about handsome fighting men.

The piece on the left, "A mighty good friend to have around", exhorts the little known fact that gargling with this mouthwash twice a day is as good as... wait !

Why is that guy smiling like that for? A friend indeed in a great adventure?

"WWII magazine", 1945
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The piece on the right is no less camp. The last image on the bottom is pure gold, with G.I. Joe driving his jeep thorough the battlefields of Europe, and complaining about his parched, cracked lips.

Now you know: vanity wins wars.

Black meets White

Long before Michael Jackson did the racially wrong change -or was it a skin disease?- from black to not-quite-white, there was plenty of ads like this one,

"Skin tone cream", 1959
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A quick check on Wikipedia for the Miracle-Action ingredient, Hydroquinone, reveals the sombre reality -products containing it have been banned for several years as potential carcinogens. 


Now you know. Fifty years too late.


Still today in some places, like India, it is socially ok to bleach your skin with hydroquinone. Even if you get cancer later.

Be fair to your hair

According to this piece, you get dandruff if your scalp is not fully awake.

"Wake up", 1946
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Fun. Restful. Etcetera. It's just a coincidence that 65 years later similar quacks are advertised in late-night TV. Some things never change.

Your sights are set on me

I really want to shake the hand of the adman that came up with this bizarre piece,

"Are your sights set...", 1959
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You mean black people go on dates toting shotguns -posing as old white people do- and they worry about their deodorant? I can think of the words patronizing and race-insensitive in the same sentence.

For crying out loud. I'm so relieved the sixties actually changed all that.

Baby defends with gun

Is this for real? This baby is protecting his cotton buds with a gun. And he looks angry as well.

"Warning to grownups", 1957
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It's really hard to think of a positive message with this ad -shooting people for using your toiletries is just not nice. Especially when they're close family.